April 16 2016
I once knew this center by the name of Shaquille Body of a giant, hilariously real.
Alright, so I'm a white guy that can't rap but loves to get drunk and try anyway. I once held a flow for a minute and honestly it ranks right up there with hitting the game-winning shot in an 8th grade CYO basketball game and striking out 16 in 7 innings of work in high school.
So Shaquille O'Neal has now entered the national spotlight once more with this ridiculously hilarious freestyle bit about Kobe Bryant. I've known a few people who can carry the flow better than Shaq, which means that Shaq isn't that good. But funny, yes. Frickin' hilarious, yes. His diss on Kobe not winning and getting the entire crowd to chant "Kobe tell me how my ass tastes", repeatedly, must go on a short list in today's poliitically correct climate as being one of the single-most outrageous moments in recent years. You have two former (unofficial) co-MVP teammates from a three-peat dynasty, both embroiled in huge controversy, involved in a soap opera spat sending Shaq packing, only to watch Kobe go to Denver assumedly (as Shaq puts it) smellin' some ass in one of the trials of the century. You couldn't write this script in your wildest dreams.
The beef was supposedly settled, and when asked for comment after tape of this show surfaced on on TMZ.com (the story is here) Shaq asked them to post a similar "song" he made about Vlade Divac during their playoff series with the Sacramento Kings, presumably to cushion the blow of this hitting the blogosphere (Vlade when reached for comment had this to say). He has also said that he's cool with Kobe.
Somehow I don't think the feeling will be mutual.